Complicated

Complicated (adjective) \ˈkäm-plə-ˌkā-təd\ Consisting of parts intricately combined.

If you are wondering what my life is really like as the parent of two Harlem Success Academy (HSA) students, the only adjective that comes to mind is: Complicated. In the beginning of the school year you are asked to sign “The Contract”.  The contract is an agreement between you and the Harlem Success Academy that says, essentially, if your child is to be a HSA scholar, you are committing your life to HSA. You sign on the dotted line and marry HSA until death (or graduation) do you part!  In sickness and in health this commitment includes the understanding that an HSA parent is an active participant in his/her child’s education.  Uniform compliance, on-time arrival and 100% attendance are MANDATORY and non-negotiable!

The life of a HSA parent is a seemingly endless mélange of shuffling papers, homework packets, rubrics, mandatory meetings, chess games and soccer tournaments… examples of the manageable aspects of parenting a HSA scholar.  The harder to manage aspects involve visiting libraries and bookstores searching for books that have never been read before, having to be constantly mindful of my integrity and exhibiting a perpetual sense of agency.  It’s less than pleasant to have your kid shake their head at you in a judgmental way when you just want to sleep, there’s more [insert chore of choice] to be done and your kid feels you need to try and try.  The unmanageable aspects have to do with reassuring my children that they will do well on a never-ending hamster wheel of standardized tests. Gone are the days of sitting alone in a comfy chair reading a book of my choosing that has more than 100 pages and no pictures.  Gone are the days when I could sleep soundly beyond 5:30am on any given weekday because HSA scholars are expected at school before 7:45.  Gone are the days when my summers were free to romp, frolic and island hop with out a HSA summer reading list and backpack of summer assignments.

The feelings get really complicated when the super inconvenient parts are juxtaposed with the joy I feel when my 5-year-old, kindergartener, who reads on a second grade level, reads to me from her Junie B. Jones series of chapter books.  The awe I’m in when my 2nd grader does rudimentary algebraic formulas without even realizing it… and rejoices in his accomplishment!  I’m amazed when I hear what I believe is arguing and realize it’s only a spirited debate over a chess game.  I’m inspired when I see the pride my scholars have in their appearance and the confidence they exude when they speak to adults.  I’m exuberant at the prospects of them belonging to the next generation of American leaders.  Their enthusiasm for learning is infectious!  I’m proud to be a HSA parent but being married requires a great deal of dedication and commitment and living with the Harlem Success Academy “ain’t easy”!